ESPN's Bob Ley and Stuart Scott are smiling.
Their legendary broadcasting buddy, Chris Berman, stepped way "outside the lines" this morning on my sports television talk show with a bold prediction. Booyah!
Commenting on last night's ESPY Awards in LA, the Swami passionately picked me - Michael Anthony Raffone, aka Mike Raffone, or simply MIKE as a lock for a 2011 ESPY in a new ESPY category as Breakout Broadcaster of the Year!
Uncharacteristically agitated at his beloved employer, Berman bemoaned that the World Wide Leader in Sports has apparently whiffed on the opportunity to sign me - the World Wide Leader in Sports Humor - to a long term Sports Center anchor gig!
Berman berated ESPN management as "rumblin', bumblin' and stumblin" their way through contract negotiations with my agent. ESPN's most revered television reporter appeared exasperated by the thought of probably losing me - the Long Awaited Microphone Messiah - to a rival sports media company. ESPN co-hosts Ley and Scott shared similar sentiments.
Berman stated, "MIKE is a perfectly constructed Titanium American Microphone manufactured with only the finest imported components. He can't possibly make a mistake......unless a team of writers and animators program him to do something stupid."
Berman continued by saying, "ESPN will look back...back...back... years from now and painfully regret its decision not to sign this new MIKE guy for the next Millenium. Picking any human smooth-talking suit over MIKE rivals that of the Blazers drafting Sam Bowie over another Mike way back in 1984!"
Calls to ESPN management were not returned. Speculation surfaced that high powered heads in Bristol will roll for failing to sign me - the new Ultimate Talking Head in Sports!
Berman blasted bureaucrats in Bristol and bemused that, as America's favorite new sportscaster, I... will... go... all... the... way........to the ESPY podium in LA in July 2011.
Straight talk. No static.
MIKE - thee American made voice on sports!
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Showing posts with label Stuart Scott. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Stuart Scott. Show all posts
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Enough of Kobe's Beefs!
OK, I've had enough of Kobe's "beefs!"
No, I'm NOT referring to Japan's Kobe Beef... as in the finest steak in the world.
However, I am lamenting Los Angeles Laker Kobe Bryant's non-stop bickering beefs; i.e. the murmuring, complaining, whining, sulking and moaning we witness every time this loquacious Laker steps on the hardwood.
Right now, Boston Celtic fans are probably scrambling to canonize me as the new patron saint of Beantown for my audacious, long overdue proclamation, while loyal Left Coast Laker fans are boiling mad with plans to excoriate me somewhere on ritzy Rodeo Drive for all of SoCal to see.
Hey, I'm the first to admit that Kobe Bryant is arguably the best player on the planet. Sorry, Lebron-lovers. But, hear me loud and clear Laker faithful, Kobe's pissy attitude, once again, during the recent Laker - Suns Western Conference Finals was totally inexcusable.
Coach Phil Jackson should bury a baby's binkie in Bryant's mouth instead of tippy-toeing around the Lakers' $30 Million per year Prima Donna. What a disgrace that Jackson goes along with his star guard's glaring, glowering and grimacing every time he misses a shot - or sanctions the sulking sewage that flows offensively out of his mouth toward the refs just as effortlessly as BP's blundering oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.
Why don't we hear Marv Albert or Kenny The Jet Smith or Charles Barkley or Jeff Van Gundy step up with some stones and speak out against the belly-aching Bryant? Sadly, we see plenty of other sniffling television sportscasters like Stuart Scott and Doug Collins molly-coddle Kobe's contentious conduct and carelessly condone his condescending comments aimed directly at his very own Laker teammates.
Basketball fans, here's hoping the diminutive NBA Czar David Stern, always eager to pontificate before a camera, bottles up the bickering, babbling Bryant before the Boston - Los Angeles series begins tonight.
Enough of Kobe's "beefs," so we can all enjoy a great NBA Finals!
MIKE - thee American made voice on sports!
No, I'm NOT referring to Japan's Kobe Beef... as in the finest steak in the world.
However, I am lamenting Los Angeles Laker Kobe Bryant's non-stop bickering beefs; i.e. the murmuring, complaining, whining, sulking and moaning we witness every time this loquacious Laker steps on the hardwood.
Right now, Boston Celtic fans are probably scrambling to canonize me as the new patron saint of Beantown for my audacious, long overdue proclamation, while loyal Left Coast Laker fans are boiling mad with plans to excoriate me somewhere on ritzy Rodeo Drive for all of SoCal to see.
Hey, I'm the first to admit that Kobe Bryant is arguably the best player on the planet. Sorry, Lebron-lovers. But, hear me loud and clear Laker faithful, Kobe's pissy attitude, once again, during the recent Laker - Suns Western Conference Finals was totally inexcusable.
Coach Phil Jackson should bury a baby's binkie in Bryant's mouth instead of tippy-toeing around the Lakers' $30 Million per year Prima Donna. What a disgrace that Jackson goes along with his star guard's glaring, glowering and grimacing every time he misses a shot - or sanctions the sulking sewage that flows offensively out of his mouth toward the refs just as effortlessly as BP's blundering oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico.
Why don't we hear Marv Albert or Kenny The Jet Smith or Charles Barkley or Jeff Van Gundy step up with some stones and speak out against the belly-aching Bryant? Sadly, we see plenty of other sniffling television sportscasters like Stuart Scott and Doug Collins molly-coddle Kobe's contentious conduct and carelessly condone his condescending comments aimed directly at his very own Laker teammates.
Basketball fans, here's hoping the diminutive NBA Czar David Stern, always eager to pontificate before a camera, bottles up the bickering, babbling Bryant before the Boston - Los Angeles series begins tonight.
Enough of Kobe's "beefs," so we can all enjoy a great NBA Finals!
MIKE - thee American made voice on sports!
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